Family Bytes

How many times have you fabricated an alibi that you are sick just to avoid attending a party, or a meeting or even going to the office? Did you not experience in one or more occasions feeling sick afterwards? That's the power of the mind working against you.

There were times in my life when I was so afraid that my son would acquire viral infections or any other ailments just because the babies of my colleagues are sick. After giving so much thought on that, I will just find my son suffering the same condition. It may be just a coincidence but it's also possible that I have invited that negative energy to come to life. Realizing that, I resolved to dump all negative thoughts as quickly as possible. I am now more determined to think good thoughts. Thereby, I have opened myself to God's abundance.

Your mind is so powerful. That is why it is important that you choose the focus of your thoughts. You are naturally drawn to whatever you focus upon. Imagine yourself in a miserable state and in no time you will feel miserable. On the other hand, picture yourself as happy, successful and enjoying the beauty of life. Instantly, you will feel refreshed, hopeful and ready to face the challenges of life.

Since our mind is powerful, why not focus yourselves in creating positive thoughts rather than draining your energy into negatives. You may be bombarded now by problems and financial burdens, but thinking more about it will not do you any good. In fact, it may be even worse when your health suffers and succumb to anxiety. Headaches, hyperacidity and even nervous breakdowns are just some of the ailments that you may develop in putting so much stress into your lives.

Why not focus on the solutions instead. Acknowledge the problem but quickly shift your thoughts into the possible solutions. In case of marital conflict, for example, think of ways on how you can remedy the problem. Do you need to consult a marriage counselor, or just sit down and talk about it, or just set up a romantic date and rekindle the fire in your relationship? In case of financial concerns, you may start by letting go of the things that you can do without like dinner outs and fancy gadgets. Some issues may look deeper than what I have cited, but the point is that you have to use the power of your mind to your advantage.

Believe that you have the power to better your life. Think positive. Focus on your dreams. Have high hopes. Trust in God and make a fresh start.

Are you aware that you are a unique individual? You have a rare characteristic that nobody in this planet has. You have distinctive fingerprints and you have a natural perfume distinctive enough for a bloodhound to trail you. You have innate characteristics that are different from the rest.

Our stomachs vary in size, shape and contour. Our nervous systems are distinct, the sizes of normal heart varies and our brains are extremely variable. According to Dr. Karl S. Lashley, "The brain is extremely variable in every character that has been subjected to measurement. Its diversities of structures within the species are of the same general character as are the differences between related species, or even between orders of animals." Your brain probably differs from your colleagues, neighbors and even your family members far more than your facial features vary from them. In effect, each of us has highly distinctive mind.

Knowing that we are all unique individuals will help us create and develop better relationships. How? By trying to understand that our level of happiness as well as sadness varies. Therefore, we cannot expect our friends, colleagues and even superiors in the office to react the same way that we do in a given situation. Even siblings coming from the same set of parents should not be expected to have the same levels of intellect, interests and emotional well-being.

Take the case of our family, my parents separated when I was seven. Naturally, it is heartbreaking for all of us. At that time where it is natural for people to judge the products of the 'broken family' we reacted differently to that distressing situation. We have different coping mechanisms to overcome that 'loss'. In my case, I learned to believe that I am extraordinary and that I can stand amidst all difficulties. That sad event in my life made me a stronger person and I would like to believe that it also helped me to be a better individual. Though I was made stronger by that event, (thank God) I should not expect people to behave the same way that I do for we are all extraordinary and, therefore, have different reactions and solutions to certain conditions.

Mutual knowledge about the differences can help greatly in relationships between husbands and wives. Some "petty things" that help people tear apart involve distinctive reactions: temperature, sense of time and even sleep patterns. There would not be too much expectations from the other and the feeling of "why can't you be like me or why can't you do exactly the same thing that I do to you" would be minimized or controlled if not totally eliminated. Understanding individual differences and our uniqueness will to a great extent create more harmonious relationship. It also gives us a basis for realizing our own individual worth. It unlocks the door to a real and appreciative understanding of ourselves and others, and of how people individually can make the most of the God-given potentials and equipment they have.

Remember, 'You are Extraordinary.' You are special and that you can make a difference in this life. March to the beat of your own drums and make your life exceptional.